Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Brain on a warehouse floor

As Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator’s spaceplane rocketed into the sky, Lilith sadly looked down at what was once a brain in a jar now smeared across the concrete floor of the warehouse.

“Oh Nemmy,” she sobbed. “I’m sorry I couldn’t stop him.”

“No matter.” I opened the door where I was monitoring the altercation and moved out onto the warehouse floor. “I assure you that I am quite all right.”

“Nemmy? Is that you?” My companion ran towards me and threw her arms around my brain containment tank. “But what about…”

“I used a stunt brain. Our nemesis is clearly intellectually inferior but I had no doubt that he is dangerously lucky as well. I needed to see him in action firsthand without endangering myself. Had you killed him, even better, though I had a theory that you would not succeed at this time.”

“I had him until he punched me,” Lilith responded while rubbing her sore jaw. “The next time I see that bastard, I’m going to shoot his kneecaps and wear his guts as a shawl for punching a woman like that.”

“Yes, his actions prove how primitive and offensively discourteous he is. Yet this luck he’s had fascinates me.”

“That’ll will run out when I see him next,” she yelled across the open space as she retrieved her weapons.

“Yet, I’m not entirely convinced that his luck is all his doing. While observing this altercation, I could detect the mental presence of another. Jon’s ally Professor Xavier was monitoring this event as well, no doubt dulling your reaction and senses while mentally stimulating his.”

“Are you sure?” my companion scowled.

“I am certain. While I do not possess the stunning mental abilities of this mutant, I do have some of my own. I could feel his presence much like you could feel the water if you dipped your hand in a filled glass.”

“So that’s how Jon got me,” she scowled again.

“Yes. Well it seems that before destroy Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator, it is necessary to make a small detour in our plans. We destroy Professor Xavier. Dissecting his brain to uncover how his powers work will be my next and greatest experiment.”

I then allowed myself one of those loud, long evil laughs. I don’t normally indulge myself in that type of thing, but I was caught up in the moment. I have to admit, it was a nice laugh that echoed off my vocoder and filled this warehouse.

Tuesday, February 5, 2008

My Dark Lord Summons Me

“Nemmy, honey, there is an odd sound coming from your meditation chamber.”

“An odd sound?”

“I can’t quite describe it,” Lilith continued. “It almost sounds like a ringing, only far more ominous.”

“It is my dark master Galactor the Evil Galactic Overlord calling me. I knew this was coming, though I had hoped it wouldn’t be for some time yet.”

“What does he want?”

“I would imagine that he wants to know why I haven’t completed my assignment here on Earth. Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator remains alive. I must answer the call.”

I maneuvered my brain containment device into my sanctum and activated the communicator. Instantly, a holographic image of my master flickered to life.

“My dark lord and master.”

“Report,” his voice rumbled back to me. “Is the gladiator dead?”

“I am afraid not. I have tried, but he has proven to be quite resilient.”

“Indeed,” the overlord rumbled. “Perhaps this task is not where your abilities lie. Perhaps I should send the Mangalores to take care of this.”

“Oh no, that would not be wise, my master. The Mangalores couldn’t even get up in the morning without causing a calamity and possibly several explosions. You entrusted me with this mission because you needed this done covertly. Allow me to assure you that I am still the man, or brain as it were for the job.”

The image of my dark master froze for a moment before crackling back to life.

“Very well,” he said. “I have confidence that you will be able to complete this project. Do you need any of my troops or weapons there?”

“No, my lord. I have taken on an Earth female as a companion. She is all that I need for this.”

I thought I saw Galactor’s face crack a slight smile for a moment. It disappeared just as quickly, however.

“Indeed,” he answered. “This woman of yours, is she good?”

“She is, my lord. She is deadly as well as ‘easy on the eyes’ as the natives here say.”

Now I am sure that I saw the image of my dark lord crack a smile.

“This is unexpected. Do not let your affections for this Earth creature keep you from your goal.”

“Certainly not, my lord. The sensors of my ship have tracked the gladiator to one of this planet’s cities. We shall meet him there where he will certainly meet his doom.”

“Very well,” Galactor answered. “I have the upmost confidence in your abilities, Nemonok, but do not think that if I feel you cannot accomplish your task that I will not have you transferred to someplace else. Some place such as the fire rock mines of Dantur.”

“Certainly, my dark master. You patience and confidence in me will be rewarded. I will not fail you.”

The image of the overlord winked out as the door to my chamber slid open. My companion stepped into may chambers with a concerned look on her face.

“What is it, my love?” she asked.

“My dark lord’s patience is great, but it is not infinite. We need to destroy Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator. We shall fly out tonight to Washington DC.”